The Long and Winding Road
Morality is pointless; Information is power.
Alignment: Anyone judging someone else for what they get up to in their spare time is a nob. (True Neutral)
Race: I’ve got nothing for or against Kitsune. All I know is people seem to think they’re scheming, mischief-making pests. Can’t really say they’re wrong.
Class: Being an Inquisitor, most people tend to think I spend every waking moment forcefully brainwashing everyone to think how I do. Come now, I’d never do that.
Height: Supremely average, and the perfect height for people-watching.. 5’4"
Weight: I’m going to pretend I’m appalled you’d ask because I’m super self-conscious. Yeah, right no. 150 lbs.
Languages: I know only Common, Sylvan, and the odd Celestial. You won’t get an answer about that if you ask. Though not long ago I picked up a spell that lets me understand anyone and everyone for a bit, so basically all of them.
Proficiencies: I’d make a great detective if I could resist the temptation to mess with folk. Gathering top secret information, by any means necessary, the occasional illusion, and a frightening demeanor are what I have to offer to… myself. While I’d like to stay away from trouble, my friends need me for moral support on their inane quest to save the world. I just wish I could stay back farther from the danger.
Equipment: My kusarigama never leaves my side and everything else, including money, tends to get lost fast. I’m stockpiling bones for a rainy day now, though.
Strength: I’m a huge wimp and I couldn’t care less; Everyone else can whack things with their fists and keep me out of it. (5)
Dexterity: When a situation goes hairy I need to know my body can keep up with my head. My reflexes are excellent and I’m even ambidextrous. (16)
Constitution: I’m not sure what you can expect from a Kitsune here. I don’t take hits; Other people get hit in my place. (10)
Intelligence: Unless you’re a fat cat, you’ve gotta be smart to survive. I’ve sat in on many university lectures and riffled through my fair share of texts, so I’m more than capable of outwitting most. (16)
Wisdom: Dealing with as many people as I have, you start to see the patterns emerge. I just plain understand folk and if I run into an outlier I have my handy spells to make up for it. I rarely need them. (18+2)
Charisma: Sometimes my disposition is mistaken for rye optimism and playfulness. Whatever makes people drop their guard. (14)
I’m not going to dwell on the specifics but I’ve been through a lot: dragons, assassination, hedonism, slavery; you name it and I’ve probably been smack dab in the middle of something like it.
As for current events, I’ve found myself stuck with a naive band of opportunistic and indecisive adventurers. While I was making bank in a small trading town, they showed up and mopped the floor at the annual festival. That was only the first thing to get my interest, and shortly afterwards I reached out to them and was dragged into a fight with a gigantic blossom lady. The gods only know what they expected me to accomplish, but I managed to get into the spirit of things and since they easily overpowered the weed I was never in any trouble anyways.
The trouble started at some hole in the ground with a dragon having taken domain over it for some reason and for reasons I still can’t wrap my head around they attacked it. Soon we would lose our resident puncher, though everyone seemed pretty calm about their friend being sent to a dangerous alternate plane. Not expecting any result, I called to our then friendly contract devil who had solved an inconvenience earlier. Half of the party seemed bent on dealing death with the lawyer, which seemed like suicide to me. Luckily a weird swordsman damn near solo’d him but the spawn of lawyer hell got away, but a fracture had been cut in our group. I blame the imbecile tiefling and the generally level-headed kobold.
After sharing some precious information I was forcefully given, we learned of our supposed “destiny” involving falling castles, baby animals turned gods, and three adventurers I forget the names of. Ignoring the tiefling’s incoherent babbling, we set off to find a missing guild leader to claim the 100,000 gp reward. With the help of our new frankly disgusting hunter, we found our way through a planar looping forest and onto the front lawn of a goblin fortress. Things only turned worse, as one of my cunning plans got me a face full of fire by the damned tiefling and the kobold’s revenge fantasy overtook his judgment. Racing after his mark, we inexplicably reunited with our hobgoblin, fought the whole army, and dethroned the owner. Without the strix I’m sure we wouldn’t have stood a chance against the horde. Guild leader in tow and giant orange tiger found, we headed back to the trading town.
Finding out our reward waits for us in Marigold, we celebrated merrily with a casino binge and left town that night. A small bump in the road led us to rejoining the strange swordsman and soon after we would recognize the reason behind the hobgoblin’s debt: a settlement days out named, somewhat bafflingly, New Bojrock. We took a well earned, if a bit boring, break from traveling and discussed future affairs. I bedded as much of the guild as i could, only taking breaks for somber reflections with the cool-headed tengu.
Breaking the monotony, we cleared out a nearby kobold-infested deceased dragon’s horde and I’m ashamed to write I had an episode that makes it difficult to say what happened afterwards. In any case, now we’re hopefully rested and prepared for Marigold.